Terry

They click, but he already has a girlfriend

In Uncategorized on January 31, 2011 at 6:24 pm

Terry,

What happens when you meet a great guy, and you seem to click on every level, but then he has a girlfriend he has been with for a year?

Should you not even try to go that way, or ..?

-But I Like Him (I Really Like Him)

Dear Like-

Arrrrgh. It’s such a drag clicking with someone, only to find out he’s already spoken for.

That said, leave him alone.

If you truly clicked, then — because he’s the one in a relationship — it’s up to him to decide what he wants to do about it. It’s up to you to figure that if you don’t hear from him, he’s chosen to stay with his girlfriend.

And if you do hear from him, please make sure he’s truly free (in other words, he’s done the honorable thing and let his girlfriend go) to spend time with you.

Trying to wrest a guy away from his girlfriend (or wife) is always a bad idea. You’re doing to someone else (the girlfriend or wife) what presumably you would never want done to you. That’s bad karma.

And, even if you win, you’ve lost. You end up with a boyfriend who is too easily distracted by other women. How could you ever trust him?

But, if he does the honorable thing and extricates himself from the relationship before getting involved with you, go for it.

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  1. Terry, Great advice. You are 100% right about Karma. But what’s to make this woman think that even if she got this guy he wouldn’t turn around and eventually do the same thing to her. As my mother used to say: “A leopard doesn’t change his spots”

    Keep up the great work!

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